{"id":19526,"date":"2018-06-26T11:33:43","date_gmt":"2018-06-26T09:33:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/?p=19526"},"modified":"2018-06-26T11:34:36","modified_gmt":"2018-06-26T09:34:36","slug":"sukaliqi-autoritar-apo-liberal","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/?p=19526","title":{"rendered":"Sukaliqi: Autoritar apo liberal ndaj f\u00ebmij\u00ebve"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"<\/a>
Ilustrim<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Dilema prind\u00ebrore: <\/strong>autoritar apo liberal ndaj f\u00ebmij\u00ebve<\/strong><\/p>\n

F\u00cbMIJ\u00cbT NUK DUHET DETYRUAR, ATA DUHET T’I BINDIM<\/strong><\/p>\n

Nga Arlinda Sukaliqi<\/strong><\/p>\n

Shpesh si prind\u00ebr pyesim veten se cila gj\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb e mir\u00eb p\u00ebr f\u00ebmij\u00ebn ton\u00eb,cila sjellje ose cili qendrim \u00ebsht\u00eb i duhuri q\u00eb f\u00ebmia jon\u00eb t\u00eb marr edukimin e duhur.Na ka rastisur t\u00eb d\u00ebgjojm\u00eb se\u00a0 kontrolli i tepruar dhe autoritarizmi n\u00eb edukimin e f\u00ebmij\u00ebve,i nxit shpesh q\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebt te mos\u00a0 ken\u00eb\u00a0 besim tek prind\u00ebrit dhe rregullat e tyre,e n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb nxiten drejt\u00eb sjelljeve t\u00eb pa hij\u00ebshme.Po t\u00eb shikojm\u00eb dhe an\u00ebn tjt\u00ebr pra t\u00eb jemi liberal, t\u00eb tepruar ,tu plot\u00ebsojm\u00eb \u00e7do teke dhe aty do shohim an\u00ebn negative sepse ata llastohen dhe k\u00ebrkojn\u00eb \u00e7do gj\u00eb dhe kur nuk e kan\u00eb t\u00eb nevojshme ate.<\/p>\n

Si duket nuk ekzistojn\u00eb as\u00a0 patenta dhe as manuale p\u00ebr t’ u b\u00ebr\u00eb prind,\u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb \u201eprofesion\u201c q\u00eb m\u00ebsohet duke e ushtruar \u00e7do dit\u00eb.Secili nga ne q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb prind pyeten veten:\u201cApo b\u00ebj\u00eb gj\u00ebn\u00eb\u00a0 e duhur?Duke ia b\u00ebr\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb pyetje dhe vet\u00ebs si prind hulumtova n\u00ebp\u00ebr internet dhe rasisa t\u00eb shoh nj\u00eb hulumtim amerikan q\u00eb ishte publikuar n\u00eb nj\u00eb revist\u00eb amerikane e cila merrej me k\u00ebto \u00e7eshtje ,ku si pas saj\u00a0 shkruhej se\u00a0 ndikimi q\u00eb stilet t\u00eb ndryshme t\u00eb edukat\u00ebs kan\u00eb mbi probabilitetin q\u00eb nj\u00eb f\u00ebmj\u00eb t\u00eb sh\u00ebndrrohet n\u00eb nj\u00eb adoleshent mistrec,deri n\u00eb kriminel.Hulumtimi gjithqysh fokusohej te faktor\u00ebt psikologjik,social,ligjor q\u00eb m\u00eb von\u00eb sipas tyre ndikojn\u00eb n\u00eb ate se \u00e7far\u00eb do t\u00eb b\u00ebh\u00ebt f\u00ebmija nes\u00ebr,nj\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb jo i sjellsh\u00ebm dhe problematik apo nj\u00eb i zgjuar,i edukuar mir\u00eb dhe duke ec n\u00eb rrug\u00eb t\u00eb drejt\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Duke l\u00ebn\u00eb pas k\u00ebt\u00eb hulumtim vihet pyetja sa ne si shoq\u00ebri marrim parasysh k\u00ebto faktor\u00eb dhe \u00e7ka m\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb presim ne q\u00eb t\u00eb ndodh me f\u00ebmij\u00ebn ton\u00eb,\u00e7far\u00eb do t\u00eb b\u00ebhet ai n\u00eb t\u00eb ardhm\u00ebn?<\/p>\n

Cili \u00ebsht\u00eb stili adekuat edukues p\u00ebr f\u00ebmij\u00ebn tim ai autoritar,i eger apo i but\u00eb dhe\u00a0 liberal?Cili \u00ebsht\u00eb roli i ktyre stileve edukues mbi vet\u00ebvler\u00ebsimin e f\u00ebmij\u00ebs,besimin q\u00eb ata ushqejn\u00eb karshi prind\u00ebrve dhe ndaj rregullave te vendosuara nga k\u00ebto prind\u00ebr.<\/p>\n

Po t\u00eb pyet\u00ebn f\u00ebmij\u00ebt sidoms ato adoleshent\u00eb\u00a0 vijn\u00eb\u00a0 n\u00eb nj\u00eb p\u00ebrfundim se prind\u00ebrit autoritar\u00eb k\u00ebrkojn\u00eb dhe ushtrojn\u00eb\u00a0 kontroll t\u00eb fort\u00eb mbi f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e tyre.Vendosin zakonisht rregulla t\u00eb forta mbi t\u00eb cilat nuk diskutohet m\u00eb po vet\u00ebm respektohen.K\u00ebta prind\u00ebr as q\u00eb u shpjegojn\u00eb k\u00ebto stile edukuese e le m\u00eb t\u00eb negociojn\u00eb m\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebt.Nuk u kushtojn\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsi k\u00ebrkesave t\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebve,por presin q\u00eb k\u00ebta t\u00eb fundit tu bind\u00ebn duke v\u00ebn\u00eb k\u00ebshtu nj\u00eb lloj\u00eb komunikimi t\u00eb nj\u00ebanshem.Po ta analzojm\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb q\u00eb tham\u00eb m\u00eb lart\u00eb i bie se ne po jetojm\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb shkull t\u00eb kaluar ku fjala e prind\u00ebrit ishte e padiskutushme,duhej b\u00ebr\u00eb gjithsesi si ai donte edhe pse ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb nuk kishte t\u00eb drejt\u00eb.Si duket kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb nd\u00ebr m\u00ebnyrat m\u00eb t\u00eb k\u00ebqia t\u00eb edukimit,ose m\u00ebnyra edukuese m\u00eb e keqe e mundshme sepse mund t\u00eb nxis\u00eb rrezikun q\u00eb f\u00ebmija t\u00eb zhvilloj\u00eb nj\u00eb paknaq\u00ebsi ,q\u00eb e \u00e7on n\u00eb izolim dhe m\u00e7 e keqa q\u00eb f\u00ebmija t\u00eb mos ket\u00eb besim tek prind\u00ebri.Pasojat e k\u00ebtijf\u00ebmije pastaj do jen\u00eb:nj\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb problematik kur t\u00eb rritet ose th\u00ebn\u00eb m\u00eb mir\u00eb adoleshent problematik,rebel,i pa hishem n\u00eb sjellje etj. Po\u00a0 a e shohin nj\u00ebjt\u00eb prind\u00ebrit k\u00ebt\u00eb stil edukimi?Jo ,ato p\u00ebrkundrazi mendojn\u00eb se fjala e prind\u00ebrit e ka humbur vler\u00ebn dhe \u00e7do dit\u00eb autoriteti i tyre po humb pa e kuptuar si.Ata pohojn\u00eb se shoq\u00ebria e sotme po hyn\u00eb shpjt n\u00eb hapat e modernizimit t\u00eb teprurar ku m\u00eb nuk po kuptohet roli i prind\u00ebrit n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb mes.<\/p>\n

Ne an\u00ebn tjet\u00ebr kemi\u00a0 prnd\u00ebrit m\u00eb liberal\u00eb,m\u00eb t\u00eb but\u00eb,gjithnj\u00eb\u00a0 gati p\u00ebr t’i d\u00ebgjuar f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e tyre dhe p\u00ebr t’i kuptuat k\u00ebrkesat e tyre.Kjo kategori prind\u00ebrish vendosin pak rregulla dhe nuk shqet\u00ebsohen shum\u00eb nese k\u00ebto rregulla f\u00ebmija i respekton.Prind\u00ebrit e till prodhojn\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb m\u00eb pa t\u00eb sigurt n\u00eb vet\u00ebvete,q\u00eb b\u00ebjn\u00eb \u00e7far\u00eb duan por dhe kan\u00eb m\u00eb pak vet\u00ebkontroll.Pra kjo m\u00ebnyr\u00eb edukimi se stil edukimi ndryshon nga ajo autoritare,ku f\u00ebmij\u00ebt nuk i konsiderojn\u00eb prind\u00ebrit si figura me ndikim t\u00eb madh,megjith\u00eb\u00a0 ate nuk jan\u00eb t\u00eb prir\u00eb p\u00ebr sjellje t\u00eb keqia.<\/p>\n

Shtrohet p\u00ebrs\u00ebri pyetja a jan\u00eb k\u00ebta prind\u00ebr pik\u00ebrisht t\u00eb duhurit p\u00ebr t\u00eb nxjerr\u00eb nes\u00ebr nj\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb ekselent pa asnj\u00eb t\u00eb met\u00eb?Sigurisht qe jo.<\/p>\n

T\u00eb jemi real dhe t\u00eb themi te v\u00ebrtet\u00ebn,ne si prind\u00ebr do donim t\u00eb jemi\u00a0 autoritar\u00eb,t\u00eb kujdessh\u00ebm dhe k\u00ebrkues,por dhe t\u00eb jemi pak liberal,t\u00eb dashur,t\u00eb hapur ndaj nevoajve t\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebve,me fjal\u00eb t\u00eb tjera t\u00eb jemi gjysm\u00eb m\u00eb gjysm\u00eb,pak autoritar\u00eb e pak liberal.Vall\u00eb a mundemi k\u00ebshtu t\u00eb jemi?Nese kemi b\u00ebr\u00eb nj\u00eb pun\u00eb t\u00eb mir\u00eb si prind\u00ebr autoritar\u00eb ,duhet t\u00eb kemi f\u00ebmij\u00eb q\u00eb k\u00ebnaqen m\u00eb gj\u00ebrat q\u00eb kan\u00eb ,m\u00eb nj\u00eb vet\u00ebkontroll t\u00eb mir\u00eb dhe n\u00eb t\u00ebr\u00ebsi t\u00eb kenaqur.K\u00ebshtu f\u00ebmij\u00ebt do t\u00eb din\u00eb t\u00eb njohin autoritetin tuaj dhe do t\u00eb sill\u00ebn mir\u00eb,edhe at\u00ebher kur ju nuk do jeni aty p\u00ebr t’i kontrolluar,sepse kan\u00eb besim n\u00eb rregullat qe ju i vendosni dhe mendojn\u00eb se jan\u00eb t\u00eb duhurat.N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb ata do t\u00eb kuptojn\u00eb se \u00e7el\u00ebsi i vertet i suksesit qendron n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00ebn q\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebt jan\u00eb t\u00eb gatsh\u00ebm t\u00eb pranojn\u00eb p\u00ebrpjekjet e prind\u00ebr\u00ebve t\u00eb tyre\u00a0 p\u00ebr t’i p\u00ebrgaditur ata p\u00ebr jet\u00ebn shoq\u00ebrore.Prind\u00ebr te dashur nese doni nj\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb t\u00eb shendetsh\u00ebm dhe t\u00eb edukuar mir\u00eb mos u mundoni t\u00eb jeni shum\u00eb autoritar ,me fjal\u00eb t\u00eb tjera f\u00ebmij\u00ebt nuk duhet detyruar,ata duhet t’i bindim.<\/p>\n

Jeni ai model i prind\u00ebrit i cili pak po leshon pe ndaj liberalit sepse k\u00ebshtu f\u00ebmija s’do t\u00eb b\u00ebj\u00eb rezistenc\u00eb ndaj rregullave t\u00eb vendosura por p\u00ebrkundrazi ai do t’i respektoj\u00eb ato duke par\u00eb se dhe ju po b\u00ebni nj\u00eb sakrific\u00eb p\u00ebr ta.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dilema prind\u00ebrore: autoritar apo liberal ndaj f\u00ebmij\u00ebve F\u00cbMIJ\u00cbT NUK DUHET DETYRUAR, ATA DUHET T’I BINDIM Nga Arlinda Sukaliqi Shpesh si prind\u00ebr pyesim veten se cila gj\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb e mir\u00eb p\u00ebr f\u00ebmij\u00ebn ton\u00eb,cila sjellje ose cili qendrim \u00ebsht\u00eb i duhuri q\u00eb f\u00ebmia jon\u00eb t\u00eb marr edukimin e duhur.Na ka rastisur t\u00eb d\u00ebgjojm\u00eb se\u00a0 kontrolli i […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":11287,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[2,12],"tags":[1906],"class_list":["post-19526","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-aktualitet","category-opinione","tag-arlinda-sukaliqi"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19526","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=19526"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19526\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":19528,"href":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19526\/revisions\/19528"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/11287"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=19526"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=19526"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ulqini-online.com\/sajti\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=19526"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}